In my autobiography I called for “a preferential option for the young” to be a value alongside that of a “preferential option for the poor.”  Not only because the young are often poor, but also because adultism is a very clear reality in our times and spiritual poverty can prove to be more dangerous than material poverty.

Voiceover of Ted Cruz speech to the 2022 NRA convention, days after the Uvalde school shooting, with a montage of family photos with assault rifles and other guns. Tweet by @CWebbOnline (you may need to turn on the audio).

To me, the latest news of the multiple murders of young people by young people brings up this issue all over again.  And in a deep way.  We grieve the loss of life.  But we also need to ask: Why?  Why are young people (95% boys) killing young people and others indiscriminately?

One issue is the lack of meaningful rites at puberty (no, confirmation as it is now practiced does not cut the mustard.  Ask people, as I have over the years, if confirmation was a meaningful ritual for them.)  As Malidoma Some tells us, in a society lacking in rites of passage, the young are confused and angry, the adults are bewildered, and the elders are missing.

We should bring both rites of passage for young people and rites of passage for elders alive and effective and meaningful.  Too many elders are out of touch with their responsibilities and dignity as elders to interact with the youth and exchange wisdom and stories and values that can assist our species to survive.

What does the healthy masculine look like?  What does it mean to be a (healthy) man?

What does the healthy feminine look like?  What does it mean to be a healthy woman?

Postcard from Cosmic Mass themed on the Green Man.

Do we really want to leave it to the media and consumer capitalism that drives the media to give us its version of consumer citizenship as the epitome of healthy adulthood?

That is one reason I turn to the mystics to teach me such important lessons.  Lessons of our capacity for compassion and love of Gaia and forgiveness and eros (passion for living, love of life) and wisdom and relationship and interdependence from the feminine side.

And from the masculine side, lover of inner strength or virtue (from the Latin for “man”) and archeytpes of father sky, the green man, the blue man, the spiritual warrior, the hunter gatherer, generous fatherhood.

Healthy men and healthy women incorporate the sacred masculine and the divine feminine in themselves whether male or female, gay or straight or trans.

Teaching these values and realities would surely constitute a preferential option for the young.  And might undo some of the bewilderment of the adults and the silencing of the elders.


Adapted from Matthew Fox, Julian of Norwich: Wisdom in a Time of Pandemic—and Beyond.  

And Fox, The Hidden Spirituality of Men: Ten Metaphors to Awaken the Sacred Masculine.

To read the transcript of Matthew Fox’s video teaching, click HERE.

Banner Image: Young men stand admiring the sunset. Photo by Helena Lopes on Unsplash

Queries for Contemplation

Which of these teachings do you feel most offer a preferential option for the young?  Are they being taught in schools and homes and churches and temples and synagogues?  How can that happen more effectively?


Recommended Reading

Julian of Norwich: Wisdom in a Time of Pandemic–and Beyond

Julian of Norwich lived through the dreadful bubonic plague that killed close to 50% of Europeans. Being an anchoress, she ‘sheltered in place’ and developed a deep wisdom that she shared in her book, Showings, which was the first book in English by a woman. A theologian way ahead of her time, Julian develops a feminist understanding of God as mother at the heart of nature’s goodness. Fox shares her teachings in this powerful and timely and inspiring book.
“What an utterly magnificent book. The work of Julian of Norwich, lovingly supported by the genius of Matthew Fox, is a roadmap into the heart of the eco-spiritual truth that all life breathes together.”  –Caroline Myss
Now also available as an audiobook HERE.

The Hidden Spirituality of Men: Ten Metaphors to Awaken the Sacred Masculine

To awaken what Fox calls “the sacred masculine,” he unearths ten metaphors, or archetypes, ranging from the Green Man, an ancient pagan symbol of our fundamental relationship with nature,  to the Spiritual Warrior….These timeless archetypes can inspire men to pursue their higher calling to connect to their deepest selves and to reinvent the world.
“Every man on this planet should read this book — not to mention every woman who wants to understand the struggles, often unconscious, that shape the men they know.” — Rabbi Michael Lerner, author of The Left Hand of God


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3 thoughts on “A Preferential Option for the Young?”

  1. Richard Reich-Kuykendall
    Richard Reich-Kuykendall

    Matthew, You say that In your autobiography you called for “a preferential option for the young” to be a value alongside that of a “preferential option for the poor.” Then you say, “Not only because the young are often poor, but also because adultism is a very clear reality in our times and spiritual poverty can prove to be more dangerous than material poverty.” Why ??? In asking people over the years if confirmation was a meaningful ritual for them, we find that is becoming less and less meaningful. As Malidoma Some tells us, in a society lacking in rites of passage, the young are confused and angry, the adults are bewildered–and the elders are missing. That is one reason you turn to the mystics to teach you such important lessons. Lessons of our capacity for compassion and love, and forgiveness and eros, and wisdom and relationship and interdependence from the feminine side. And from the masculine side, lover of inner strength or virtue (from the Latin for “man”) and the archetypes of father sky, the green man, the blue man, the spiritual warrior, the hunter gatherer, and generous fatherhood. So you, in turn teach us to be healthy men and women who incorporate the sacred masculine and the divine feminine in ourselves whether male or female, gay or straight or trans. We should bring both rites of passage for young people and rites of passage for elders–alive, effective, and meaningful. Too many elders are out of touch with their responsibilities and dignity as elders, to interact with the youth and exchange wisdom and stories and values that can assist our species to survive. However, for the most part, these things are not being taught in schools, homes, churches, temples and synagogues? In the last number of years I feel the most preferential option for the young have been the Cosmic Masses, but also we need to be doing liturgies that reflect our love for Mother Earth–but in a way that is flexible and meaningful for young people, rather than voted in by a patriarchal majority over 50 years ago, which is nearly as unchangeable as the dogmas of the Church.

  2. Avatar

    Alot of our youth, if they make it through high school, are dropping out of further educational institutions. As well, many live in dysfunctional homes. Most won’t go anywhere near a temple, church or synagogue. Sometimes, they will go to a Youth Center. Years ago I worked at one such place. One day, the Director casually came in and had a conversation with me. During our talk I pitched an idea I had of hooking this Youth Center up with a rites of passage program called Outward Bound. This program took the youth out into nature, on a portaging camping excursion, with counselors and naturalists, and it was only a couple of hours away, and was government funded. He loved the idea. I guess he had a conversation later, with my superior. She called me into her office, for what I thought was going to be a meeting about pursuing the idea I had pitched, during the casual conversation I had, with the Director. What actually happened was that I was reprimanded and given a three day suspension for not following the so called proper chain of command. This woman was interested more in her status of position and superiority over, making sure to put me in my place, rather than the whole concept of rites of passage in nature, that the youth definetely could have benefited from. Needless to say, I left this Youth Center shortly after this incident; and the Youth Center itself closed down within a years time.

  3. Avatar

    Faith and valuing the wisdom/teachings of our universal mystical perennial spiritual traditions from around the world, including Indigenous spirituality — that our eternal True Heart Selves/Souls and our Creator Spirit of Divine Love~Wisdom~Truth~Peace~Justice~Healing~Transformation~Creativity~Beauty~Joy are ONE and Present within, through, among, around us in All of ongoing co-Creation~Evolution on Sacred Mother Earth and in our multiverse Cosmos….
    🔥💜🌎🙏

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